How Does Therapy Help with Shame with ADHD?

Several hours ago, I promised myself I would write a blog post about how therapy helps with ADHD. I sat down to write and immediately got back up as I suddenly realized the exact way that I should arrange the appliances on my kitchen counters to make cooking more efficient. I also tested the microphones for my podcast, had dinner with my partner, and learned that the curtain rod I got was too large for my window. 

What does this have to do with how therapy can help ADHD? Well, as you can see, I did in fact write this blog post as you are reading it right now. This would not have been possible without the therapeutic insight that life with ADHD is likely not going to look like life without it and that the sooner I could accept that idea, the better. However, living life in a neurotypical world means that starting from a very early age, we constantly get the message that we are somehow “doing it wrong.” This can lead to us masking our true selves, doing our best to live up to the expectations of how things are “supposed” to be done and feeling immense amounts of shame when we either fail or fall short of that narrative. That shame can then immobilize us, causing us to withdraw and isolate instead of expressing ourselves in the world.

Therapy can help dispel the shame that often gets unfairly dumped onto those of us with sparkly ADHD brains. In the past, I might have been ashamed that writing my blog post looked a whole lot like I was dashing around my home but I knew that I was going to write it once I felt ready, which is in fact what happened. Therapy helped me to be curious about what motivates me instead of critical so I could be kinder to myself when I was approaching a task like writing. Talking to a therapist can help you better understand how ADHD shows up for you so that you can embrace how you operate instead of trying to fight it. There is often a lot of grief in letting go of what you might have thought your life might look like but also a lot of joy in the possibilities that unfold when you can practice acceptance and joy for who you are. 

If you feel that ADHD therapy could be helpful for you, please get in touch with us to schedule a free consultation.