People with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) can face unique challenges while navigating dating. Hyperfixation in romantic relationships is a common experience people with ADHD encounter in the social world. Many individuals living with ADHD to want to source dopamine through new relationship energy but this can create more ruptures than lasting connections.

Here are some things to consider when hyperfixation on romantic relationships and ADHD come together:

Hyperfocus and New Relationship Energy can be a Potent Mix–ADHD hyperfocus can lead to a sense of heightened excitement, interest, and passion during the initial stages of a relationship. When combined with impulsivity, it can at times increase the risk of putting dopamine seeking before healthy boundaries and people can get carried away with the “new relationship energy.”
Dopamine-Seeking Behavior is a characteristic hallmark of ADHD–ADHD is associated with a nervous system with lower levels of dopamine, a neurotransmitter linked to pleasure and reward. Seeking out activities that provide an instant dopamine boost, such as novelty and excitement of a new relationship, is common. This can lead to a cycle of seeking new experiences to maintain that feeling and compete with other considerations when navigating a new relationship.
Anxiety in Relationships–Anxiety can pop up after the initial thrill diminishes or when faced with the challenges of maintaining a long-term relationship. The fear of boredom or lack of stimulation can contribute to relationship anxiety, causing individuals to seek out new stimuli or be overtaken by impulsivity. The sense of emotional risk can increase while novelty/newness decreases the longer a relationship continues, which can compete with the lower emotional risk and higher novelty combination that is likely more present earlier in the relationship with those first waves of new relationship energy.

Navigating hyperfixation on romantic relationships for individuals with ADHD includes a combination of self-awareness, communication, and putting to practice effective coping strategies in order to create healthy and fulfilling connections. Although impulsivity, hyperfocus, and dopamine seeking can create challenges in moving through the relational world, there are tools at hand to address the anxiety associated with developing relationships.

Therapy can help you navigate your relationships more smoothly as you can gain insight into the ways that hyperfixation may be affecting your behavior and emotions. Schedule a free consultation with one of our therapists today to see how ADHD affirming therapy can help.

Tips for Navigating Hyperfixation in Romantic Relationships for ADHD Individuals